modalops

There’s one thing I learned a long time ago; if you listen to
the language or words that people use, they’ll tell you
exactly how they construct their experience of the world.
Trust that there is a BIG difference in the words used by
those who are happily achieving, and those used by people
who are trying to be happy.

There is a category of words known as modal operators that
can mean the difference between a task being an arduous
feat and the same achievement being performed with ease.
There are four different categories of modal operators:

•        Desire: want, hope, wish, etc.
•        Necessity: have to, should, etc.
•        Possibility: can, able to, etc.
•        Choice: decide, choose, etc.

Modal operators (the ones we use in a given sentence or
phrase) describe how we interact with an event or activity.
Most people normally have no awareness of their use of
language and how it impacts or even creates the
experiences they have. Fortunately, creating this awareness
can happen in an instant, and when it does, something that
can seem like magic has the opportunity to unfold.

You see, when we are aware of how we describe or talk
about our experience, we can then decide to change the
way we use those words, and thus change our experience. I
invite you to play around with the following “word game.”

Simply read the following sentences out loud, and notice
how each one shifts the way you think and feel. There is no
right or wrong here, just notice how each sentence changes
your experience.

•        “I want to do the laundry.”
•        “I have to do the laundry.”
•        “I can do the laundry.”
•        “I choose to do the laundry.”

So, which way do you normally talk about doing the laundry?
For most people it’s either “I have to…” or “I need to….”
Neither one of these really make you feel warm and fuzzy.
What would happen though, if you started to take all of the
things like laundry that you used to hate doing, and started
to talk or think about them in a way that is similar to how you
currently talk and think about the things you really enjoy?

I’ll tell you what will happen; you will “trick” your brain into
believing that you really do enjoy those activities. “Wait a
minute…..TRICK my brain?” you might think. Absolutely, you
will “trick” it in the very same way you “tricked” (taught) it to
dislike doing the laundry, exercising, or eating healthy. In
fact, if you prefer you can think about all of language as a
“trick” for the nervous system. You may want to remember
though, that some of those “tricks” lead to desirable
experiences, and some do not.

Let’s look at each modal operator a little closer. When I
describe something using a modal operator of necessity, it
seems as though I have a wicked tyrant prodding me from
behind, shoving me towards something that I’d rather not be
doing. If I say, “I need to exercise” I have, in a sense,
created my own resistance to exercising, and with enough
repetition I will eventually condition my nervous system to
have this response to exercise automatically.

The modal operator of desire however has a magnetic
“personality” about it; it’s as though the activity described is
“attracting” me to it through some unseen force. “I want to
exercise” is one way of talking about exercise that will create
a dramatic shift in how you process your thoughts and
feelings about this part of your health plan.

Now, if we look at the modal operators of possibility, we
notice that we seem to focus on or think about the future
when we structure our thoughts and language with words
like able to, possible to, and capable. When we say, “I can
exercise” we are essentially saying, “I can if I want, but I can
also decide not to.”

Finally, the modal operator of choice instills a sense of
having many different alternatives available to select from. “I
choose to exercise” infuses us with freedom and a feeling of
controlled power.

Imagine what it would be like to wake up tomorrow morning
and choose to initiate one change you had been thinking
about. This is a very relaxing way to start the day when
contrasted with getting up and thinking about what you
should do, or what you need to do.

You might very well enjoy writing down a list of things that
have been less than enjoyable to do, and then begin to
“listen” to how you think about those activities; what words
do you routinely use? After you have identified what modal
operators you have been using, substitute those with some
from the other categories.

While changing your use of modal operators will probably
not constitute a complete transformation of your life, you
may be surprised to discover just how easily you are able to
begin engaging in the behaviors that will.

© Copyright 2007, Vincent Harris. All rights reserved.